Why Do People Care About Your Fitness Choices?

As a fitness instructor, I’ve noticed how much people can get invested in what you’re doing with your workouts. Whether you’re in love with POUND, focusing on strength training, or mixing in some yoga, people sometimes feel the need to chime in with their two cents. It's interesting how personal these conversations can get, almost as if your choice is somehow a reflection on theirs.

Here’s what I’ve come to realize: when people see you making different fitness choices, they sometimes interpret it as a critique of what they’re doing—even though that's not what’s happening at all. It’s like, “Wait, you don’t use pre-workout?!” Suddenly, they feel the need to defend why they can’t get through a workout without it. But the thing is, you’re not judging them at all. You’re just doing what works best for you.

We All Have Different Fitness Journeys

What people forget is that fitness isn’t a one-size-fits-all thing. Everyone’s body responds differently, and what works for you might not work for someone else. I love leading my POUND and STRONG Nation classes because they’re energetic, empowering, and full of variety. But that doesn’t mean I’m saying everyone should ditch their usual routine to join me (although it’s super fun!). It’s just my way of staying active and feeling great.

It’s a bit like how some people look at marriage or kids—what feels like a huge commitment to one person might feel totally manageable to someone else. You’re not saying, “This is the only way to live,” you’re just choosing what makes sense for you. And honestly, the same goes for your workouts.

Changing Trends, Changing Mindsets

What’s seen as “right” or “best” in fitness changes all the time. At one point, everyone was doing cardio, thinking it was the only way to lose weight and stay fit. Now, we know strength training is equally important. Here are a few more fitness trends that have changed over time:

1. Cardio Over Strength Training: Years ago, people believed if you weren’t sweating buckets on the treadmill, you weren’t getting a good workout. Now, we know that lifting weights builds muscle, boosts metabolism, and helps with long-term fitness. Read more on the benefits of strength training.

2. Low-Fat Diets: Remember when everything was low-fat, and we thought that was the way to stay healthy? Turns out, healthy fats are actually important! Avocados, anyone? The myth of low-fat diets explained.

3. No Pain, No Gain: There was a time when if you weren’t sore the next day, people thought you didn’t work hard enough. But now, we understand that pushing your body too hard isn’t always the best approach, and rest days are crucial. Here’s why recovery matters.

Your Choice Isn’t a Critique of Theirs

So, why do people care so much about what you’re doing with your fitness routine? I think it comes down to validation. When someone sees you making different choices, it can make them feel like their own decisions are being questioned, even though they’re not. Your choice isn’t a referendum on what anyone else is doing—it’s just what works for you.

It’s not that you’re saying, “You’re wrong for using pre-workout,” just like they’re not saying you’re wrong for skipping it. We’re all on different paths, with different goals, and that’s totally fine.

Do What Works for You

At the end of the day, your fitness journey is personal. Whether you’re hitting the gym for some heavy lifting, joining a high-energy group class, or finding your flow in yoga, what matters is that it makes you feel good and strong. You’re not asking anyone to change their routine, just like you’re not expecting anyone to skip pre-workout just because you do (though, really, you might be saving a bit on supplements 😉).

So, the next time someone seems overly interested in why you’re choosing your workout routine, just remember: they’re likely just looking for validation. And that’s okay! But your choice isn’t a critique of theirs, and their choice doesn’t need to define yours. We all have our own journey, and as long as it works for you, that’s all that matters.

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Sources:

• Benefits of Strength Training:

  • Mayo Clinic - Strength Training: Why It Matters

• The Low-Fat Diet Myth:

  • Harvard Health Publishing - The Low-Fat Diet Myth

• Why Recovery Days Matter:

  • Verywell Fit - Importance of Recovery Days

The Myth of "I'm Here for You"—Why Empty Support Is Worse Than Silence

We've all heard it before—the classic, hollow refrain that seems to echo louder during life’s hardest moments: “If you need anything, I’m here for you.” It’s often delivered in a text message, a comment on social media, or even a quick call. But how many times have you actually felt the support behind those words? For me, it’s all too familiar—hearing these promises during times of tragedy, only to be left completely alone when I could’ve used a real hand.

It’s not just frustrating—it’s exhausting. In fact, this kind of performative compassion can often make a tough situation worse, not better. Let’s break down why the well-meaning phrase “I’m here for you” can do more harm than good—and what we can learn about genuine support.

The Reality Behind "I'm Here for You"

What does it really mean when someone says, “I’m here for you”? For many, it’s an instinctive response, something to say when they don’t know how to actually help. It’s easy to send off a quick message and feel like you’ve done your part. But as psychologist Dr. Elizabeth Scott points out in her article on performative empathy, this kind of support often lacks follow-through. The result? The person in need is left feeling abandoned by the very people who were supposed to care the most .

I’ve had my fair share of experiences with this. After hearing “If you need anything, let me know,” I decided to actually take people up on it. I would reach out—asking for a quick call or a small favor—and suddenly, their schedule was too busy, or they were overwhelmed with their own lives. The excuse was always ready, and I was left to handle everything alone.

And here’s the thing—I’m not asking for the moon. A phone call, a text that checks in, a small act of kindness… that is what real support looks like. But saying you’re “here for me” without following through just adds insult to injury, leaving me to question why I even bothered asking.

The Performance of Sympathy on Social Media

We’ve all seen it—the social media performance of sympathy. A tragedy strikes, and suddenly your feed is flooded with people posting public declarations of support. It feels good to be publicly tagged in a heartfelt post, right? Maybe not. In fact, research shows that these kinds of public displays of empathy often do little more than make the poster feel better about themselves . For the person receiving it? It feels superficial at best.

I’ve been there. After suffering a major personal loss, I received countless “If you need me, I’m here” comments and direct messages. But when I actually needed someone? Crickets. No follow-up, no real offer to help. It was all for show—just a way for them to appear supportive without actually being there. And don’t even get me started on the performative #thoughtsandprayers that pop up on every tragedy post .

The Power of Genuine Support

Real support isn’t flashy. It doesn’t need to be broadcast on social media or shouted from the rooftops. In fact, the most meaningful help I’ve received has come from people who don’t say much at all—they just show up. Maybe it’s bringing over a meal, sending a handwritten card, or simply sitting with you in silence when you can’t even put your feelings into words.

Experts in compassionate listening agree that sometimes, words can be more damaging than silence . Rather than offering empty phrases, taking real action or simply being present can be far more impactful. If you're looking to be a true support to someone, consider asking them specific questions like, “Can I bring you something to eat?” or “I’m free to help you with errands on Thursday. Would that work?” These concrete offers show that you’re invested in helping and take the burden off the person to guess how to ask for help.

Why I’m Done With “I’m Here for You”

At this point, I’ve given up on expecting any real action from the people who casually say, “If you need me, let me know.” I’ve realized that, more often than not, it’s a phrase people use to make themselves feel better without having to put in the effort to actually be supportive. And I’m okay with that now—because honestly, I don’t need you.

I’ve been figuring out life on my own for a while now. During every hard moment, every crisis, I’ve been the one sending birthday cards, showing up to your parties, supporting you, making sure you feel loved. I’ve been driving down this one-way street of support, while the people around me barely glance in my direction. So no, I don’t need your empty promises of “being there” for me when I know you won’t show up. I’ve got it covered.

A Call for Meaningful Change

So, what can we do to change this? First off, stop offering empty words. If you don’t have the time or emotional bandwidth to help someone in a meaningful way, that’s okay—but don’t say you’re “here” for them. Instead, consider offering a small gesture, or just acknowledge their pain without committing to something you won’t follow through on .

And for those of us who’ve been on the receiving end of these empty statements, maybe it’s time to stop waiting for help that’s never going to come. We have to prioritize the people who truly show up and recognize the difference between performative compassion and the real thing. And if that means cutting out the noise and relying on ourselves a little more? So be it.

Because at the end of the day, I’m tired of pretending that an “I’m here for you” text means anything. I’ve been here for myself all along—and that’s the only constant I can count on.

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SOURCES

1. Psychology Today – Understanding Performative Empathy  

2. Harvard Business Review – The Limits of Public Sympathy on Social Media  

3. The Atlantic – The Problem with "Thoughts and Prayers"  

4. Verywell Mind – The Art of Compassionate Listening  

5. The New York Times – Why It’s Okay Not to Always Offer Help  

Finding Your Abigail: Lessons on Relationships, Boundaries, and Personal Growth

In our journeys through life, many of us pour our time, energy, and love into our relationships, often without expecting anything in return. Yet, when we face disappointment or betrayal, it’s easy to feel like David did when he was insulted by Nabal after offering protection. That moment of insult stirred a rage in David that made him consider riding off with swords drawn, ready to avenge the slight against him. While we may not brandish swords, we often contemplate cutting people off from our lives when we feel unappreciated or taken advantage of.

The biblical story unfolds as David, seeking refuge, provides protection for Nabal’s flock and later asks for supplies. Nabal, in a moment of arrogance, not only refuses but also insults David. Infuriated, David prepares for revenge, just as we might find ourselves imagining the severance of ties with those who hurt us. However, it is at this critical juncture that Abigail, Nabal’s wise wife, steps in. She quickly gathers provisions and approaches David with humility and grace. In doing so, she prevents a tragedy that could have stemmed from unchecked anger.

Abigail’s actions prompt us to reflect on our own responses to disappointment. Instead of allowing anger to dictate our actions, we can embrace the courage to respond thoughtfully. Abigail’s plea reminds us that revenge may seem justifiable, but it often carries burdens we do not wish to bear—similar to how cutting someone off might relieve immediate frustration but could also lead to regret and isolation in the long run.

In this way, Abigail acts as a voice of reason, urging David to consider not just the immediate moment, but the bigger picture of his life and destiny. She reminds him that holding onto resentment or seeking vengeance would only weigh on his conscience, diverting him from his path to greater success. This resonates with our own lives; when we’re tempted to cut people off, we should consider what we might lose beyond the relationship—like the opportunities for growth, understanding, and compassion that can arise from conflict.

This theme of perspective is echoed in the wise parable of the Chinese farmer. When faced with both misfortune and fortune—like the loss of a horse followed by the arrival of wild horses—he maintains an indifferent stance, saying, “We’ll see.” This calm acceptance highlights the idea that life events are rarely as straightforward as they seem. The apparent negative can lead to unforeseen positives, much like how Abigail’s challenging marriage to Nabal ultimately positioned her to save lives and marry David.

So, who in your life serves as your “Abigail”? Consider the individuals who offer wisdom and support during tough times. It could be a trusted friend who always seems to have the right advice, a family member who provides a listening ear, a mentor who helps you see the bigger picture, or even a therapist who guides you through your emotions. Your Abigail could be that colleague who encourages collaboration instead of competition or a spiritual leader who inspires you to practice forgiveness. Finding such individuals can be transformative, offering perspective that allows you to engage with the world more thoughtfully. 

Instead of wielding metaphorical swords or cutting people off, consider the power of open dialogue and forgiveness. In doing so, you may find that you not only preserve valuable relationships but also cultivate a deeper understanding of yourself and others. 

Ultimately, both Abigail's story and the farmer’s wisdom remind us that events in life should not be hastily labeled as good or bad. Instead, by focusing on personal growth and mutual respect in our relationships, we can navigate challenges with grace and wisdom. Embrace the lessons learned, seek out your Abigail, and allow yourself to grow into the best version of yourself, forging connections that enrich your journey.

Seeking Help: A Call for Harris County's Elderly Community

 

As we grow older, the need for assistance can become more pronounced. This truth resonates especially for many elderly individuals in Harris County, who may find themselves in challenging situations requiring support. The Bible reminds us in Proverbs 15:22, "Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers, they succeed." Seeking help before situations become dire is crucial for our senior community to maintain dignity and comfort.

The Importance of Early Intervention

Many seniors may hesitate to ask for help, thinking they can manage on their own. However, waiting until a crisis emerges can lead to stress, financial strain, and diminished quality of life. Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 states, "Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up." It's essential to recognize that reaching out for support is a sign of strength, not weakness.

Available Resources in Harris County

Fortunately, there are numerous resources available for seniors in Harris County. These agencies provide assistance with bills, housing, and other essential needs. Here are some organizations that can help:

1. BakerRipley

   • Services: Utility assistance, case management for seniors, caregiver support, and dementia-specific services.
   • Phone: (713) 590-2327 (for utility assistance) | (713) 956-1888 (senior services)
   • Website: www.bakerripley.org

2. Salvation Army Houston

   • Services: Emergency assistance for utility bills, rent, and other essential needs, as well as senior housing.
   • Locations and Phone:
     • 1500 Austin St., Houston, TX 77002 | (713) 752-0677
     • 4516 Irvington Blvd., Houston, TX | (713) 692-0522
   • Website: www.salvationarmyhouston.org

3. Catholic Charities of the Archdiocese of Galveston-Houston

   • Services: Utility and rental assistance for seniors and others facing financial difficulties.
   • Phone: (713) 874-6590
   • Website: www.catholiccharities.org

4. Harris County Community Services Department

   • Services: Assistance with rent, utilities, and transportation for seniors.
   • Phone: (713) 696-7900
   • Website: csd.harriscountytx.gov

These organizations offer a range of services designed to help seniors navigate financial challenges and access the care they need. It’s advisable to call ahead to confirm eligibility requirements and the availability of funds.

The Call to Action

As we reflect on the importance of community and support, let's encourage the elderly in our lives to seek assistance when necessary. 1 Peter 5:7 tells us, "Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you." By reaching out for help, seniors can alleviate some of their burdens and improve their quality of life.

In conclusion, let’s advocate for our elderly community members to be proactive in seeking the assistance they need before challenges escalate. Together, we can build a stronger, more supportive environment for our seniors in Harris County.

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If you know any elderly individuals in need, please share these resources and encourage them to reach out for help!

Privacy: The Antithesis of Change

Growing up, I had my own room, complete with a lock on the door. Whatever shenanigans were happening inside—whether it was a late-night snack binge or a messy arts-and-crafts explosion—was strictly my business. My mom, bless her heart, always had a talent for turning our home into a treasure hunt for lost items. But with that locked door, she could keep her own messes under wraps... Little did I know, the cozy privacy of her room was crafting a fortress against change.

The Messy Reality of Privacy

Fast forward to adulthood, and the same walls that once provided a comforting sanctuary now feel like they’re closing in. Take my mom, for example. Her famously messy habits—think trash on the floor and enough laundry to stock a thrift store—once only affected her immediate space. But now, with age and a bit of a health scare, she’s needing help to reclaim her environment, and guess what? Her mess is affecting the entire family! Who knew the hidden consequences of a closed door could manifest as a family-wide cleanup intervention?

If my mom had been more open about her struggles, maybe we could have tackled the clutter sooner. Instead, we’re now navigating a collective cleanup, which, let’s be honest, is about as enjoyable as trying to find a clean pair of socks in a room resembling a post-apocalyptic zone. (I swear, if I find one more half-eaten snack under the couch, I’m moving out!)

When Private Problems Become Public Disasters

This isn’t just a personal saga. The phenomenon of privacy stifling change extends beyond messy rooms. Just look at mental health. Many people suffer in silence, locked away in their personal struggles while the outside world remains blissfully unaware. According to the National Alliance on Mental Illness, approximately 1 in 5 adults experience mental illness in a given year. If more folks felt comfortable sharing their struggles, maybe we’d see earlier interventions and a shift in societal attitudes toward mental health.

Take the recent trend of celebrities opening up about their mental health battles. From Selena Gomez to Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson, it seems everyone is sharing their journey. It’s like a group therapy session, but with better lighting and a higher chance of being trending on X.

Then there are financial woes, where privacy creates a lovely little bubble of denial. People often hide their financial struggles, leading to the “keeping up with the Joneses” syndrome. A report by CNBC states that 69% of Americans live paycheck to paycheck. Just imagine if everyone shared their money troubles—suddenly, budgeting could be the hottest dinner conversation topic. “Oh, you’re still paying off that vacation? I just discovered the joys of instant ramen!”

The Great Escape from Reality TV

And let’s not forget the irony of reality television! Shows like Hoarders and Tidying Up with Marie Kondo capitalize on the very messes people try to keep private. When individuals finally open their doors to outsiders (or camera crews), they often discover their hidden issues are far more common than they thought. Sometimes, privacy isn’t just about protecting yourself; it’s about isolating yourself in a bubble of chaos.

Imagine if everyone started filming their messy lives. Suddenly, your average Tuesday would look like an episode of The Real Housewives of My Apartment. “Watch as Jeanicia attempts to clean her kitchen while avoiding the mystery substance growing in the corner!”

Breaking Down Barriers

So, how do we break down these barriers? First, we need to cultivate an environment that encourages openness—whether that’s in families, friendships, or workplaces. Creating a culture of sharing can lead to transformative change. Just like I’m learning to help my mom tackle her clutter (cue the motivational music), we can all start to address our issues before they become overwhelming.

After all, when we share our struggles, we often find that we’re not alone. And who knows? That friend you thought had their life together might also be drowning in a sea of unfiled paperwork and dirty dishes! (Spoiler alert: they probably are. Just ask about their closet.)

Conclusion

In conclusion, while privacy can feel like a sanctuary, it often acts as the antithesis of change. We can all benefit from a little more openness—whether that’s about our messes, our mental health, or our financial struggles. Let’s unlock those doors and tackle the chaos together! Because, in the end, change doesn’t happen in isolation; it happens in community.

For further reading on the relationship between privacy and mental health, check out these sources:

1. National Alliance on Mental Illness - Mental Health Facts
2. CNBC - Living Paycheck to Paycheck
3. Psychology Today - The Dangers of Secrecy

So, next time you think about locking your door, consider what might be waiting on the other side—because change, much like that snack you forgot about under your bed, won’t clean itself!